My dad and I in Chicago
For this assignment, I was asked to write a really good story about any personal experience. I was allowed to write about anything, no matter how scary, embarrassing, or heroic, as long as it was a true, personal story. Before writing my story, I was really concerned with the topic. It was a hard topic because it was all about me and my feelings, and I had no other readings or articles to support my ideas. Also, I felt like I did not have a story in which the topic was so interesting and unique that it would entertain readers. I decided that since I didn’t have a great story, I had to choose a simple story of my life that had involved a lot of feelings, so that I could transmit these feelings to the reader. I also had to write it in a certain way that would make my story good and interesting.
After receiving feedback from my peers, I was impressed about how much they liked my story. I liked the way I had started my story in medias res, but I wasn’t sure if the rest of the story would be compelling. My peers told me that they really liked the way I had built suspense throughout the story and hadn’t given the prank away until the very end. They said that it was one of those stories that you want to keep reading because you want to know the ending.
During the revision of my story, I tried to be more specific with my thoughts and my emotions because at some parts of the story I was focusing too much on describing what was happening in my story that I forgot to tell the reader what was happening inside of my head at that moment. I also clarified who the characters were and what their reactions had been. At the beginning of my story I had mentioned that my sister was with me, but since I didn’t talk about her throughout the rest of the story, the readers forgot that she had been present. The last correction I made to my story was the paragraph organization. I had two really long body paragraphs and I changed them into four shorter ones. Long paragraphs mixed together all the events of the story, and did not enable the reader to know when an event of my story ended and when the next event started.
Although I would like to have written a more detailed and organized story, I was really happy that I was able to write an amusing and suspenseful story out of a simple topic. I learned that, no matter the subject, just by the way you write an essay, by the style and tone you use, and by and the words and adjectives you use, you can turn a boring and ordinary topic into an interesting and entertaining essay.
To read my really good story, click here: A Dangerous Trip
Akemi Tsutsumi's E-Portfolio 